A quote and an observation

The kids have said and done a couple of funny things lately that I don't wish to forget, so I am putting them here.

Jim was setting up a new email address for himself the other evening and was getting rejection notices for all of his proposed new user names. He tried nearly every combination of his name, initials, year-of-birth etc....and was still trying to hammer it out 30 minutes later. The time devoted to this task got to be excessive so I started to make silly suggestions. Colette picked up on it and said, "So, I assume 'obsessed biker dude is out, right?" Boy, does she know her Dad!!

Last night was Ian's winter band concert at McKnight Middle School where he plays flute in the 8th grade band. He has played in the band all 3 years and it is amazing to watch the kids grow, not only physically, but musically too. The developmental change is staggering and I think it's fair to say the 8th graders rocked the house last night. They are just more practiced, bigger and better. When Ian was in 6th grade and they had a performance, we would sit in the audience, anxious and ready to see our darling boy play his flute and fill us with parental pride. The band would file in, sit in their performance chairs and scan the crowd looking for their respective Moms and Dads. It was easier for Ian to find us than the other way around, because at McKnight all the musicians wear the same thing, white tops and black pants. The girls can wear black pants or black skirts but I will write about that next year. Anyway, he would see us and smile and wave and get all red in the cheeks. It was so endearing. We would be so comforted that he saw us, he knew we were there to support him and we felt so loved by the obvious devotion written all over his face. Oh, that rush you feel when you see someone you love!! All was well with the world.

7th grade was much the same as 6th grade, same clothes, same seats, same scanning. He still checked the crowd to see Mom and Dad, but the wave was smaller. After all, none of the other kids were doing that. We could still see the sparkle in his eyes and the flush in his cheeks. He knew we were there and he liked it. We were loved.

8th grade is different. We pull up in the parking lot, he jumps out of the car, says "bye" and heads for the music room at breakneck speed. Jim, Colette and I are left in the car wondering what just happened. Then we see him halfway to the school and looking backward to make sure we aren't following close behind. This is strange, it has never been this way before. The boy was firmly lodged on my hip until the age of 4 after all. This just wasn't like him at all. So, we wait awhile in the car before we head inside to find our seats. We wanted to be there early to be near the front so we could see him and he could easily find us. Finally, it's time for his group. The 8th graders are last to perform, there they are.....same B/W clothes, same seats......same........where's the scan? No scan. What the heck? I know he sees me because he makes eye contact, but then he disappears behind the music stand. Every now and again I see him peer over it but it's more like when a person looks to see if a big, icky spider has left the shower so he can have his daily toilette. No smile, no flush, no look of endearing love, nothing. Confusion. It was almost as if he didn't want us to be there. Realization: Duh Mom, he's 14!! The moment was broken by the band teacher calling everyone to attention. They played three tough pieces and really did do a wonderful job. It was definitely the end of a phase. He may be growing out of band and being seen with his parents and sister. Even the B/W uniform has changed over the years. Once I bought him the requisite clothes, only to have him, 3 months later, be too big for them and ready for another round. With all those changes, a couple of things remained constant. We still enjoy watching him play and he still had to have the celebratory ice cream cone afterward. I will miss that era of innocence and parental love though. Hopefully Colette will give us a year or two of that yet.